boytropolis

Someone asked me today why I am single. Rather than telling him I'm a complicated guy that scares most guys than attract them, I told him I am single because I don't meet guys and that I make no effort to meet guys. True story. When I had the free time I didn't meet any potential dates; how would I meet some now that I am absorbed in work five days a week, and when my weekends are mostly spent with friends going out on heterosexual places doing heterosexual things? I had better luck meeting guys when I'm walking alone in Salcedo Village or in Glorietta, seriously. There have been a few times when my friends would set me up on dates. These few times went nowhere; one of them even died. (Rest in peace, Gene.) Still I feel a slight tinge of excitement when friends set me up on dates because

a) friends are supposed to know your taste in men
b) friends would know these men they set you up with, therefore a backgrounder is possible to attain
c) I can't set a date myself, so somebody has to do it for me

(Okay, the guy I am watching on cam just reclined and now I can see him fondling his schlong under his white brief. Just saying.)

I have probably exhausted the powers of the internet when it comes to meeting men. Or maybe, it has exhausted me. Bottomline is, sure there are nice guys out there logging onto the newest gay personals site. But I am done going through all that. It gets tiring after a long while.

(Okay, he just laid back again, for like one second, and then went back up. Maybe to type something to his co-webcam exhibitionist?)

Another random shit that I want to whine about: why is it that when you find a nice guy, chances are he's

a) your friend
b) your future friend
c) your friend's friend
d) a douchebag, really

Sometimes, I want to ask my friends to help me find guys like them so I could get back on the dating scene. Hell, sometimes I want to ask my friends out. But isn't that awkward? Knowing this person for years and then suddenly seeing him in a different light? (Maybe red light for more beerhouse action?)

(Did I mention that this guy is naked except for the white underwear and a string necklace with a fang dangling from it? Or maybe it's a small seashell. Either way it's so tacky of him.)

Truthfully, the only reason I want to get back into the dating scene is to save what is left of my optimism after losing interest in meeting anyone for the possibility of a romantic relationship. I used to have high hopes of getting that happily-ever-after ending, and I still do, and my awareness of possibly finding that elusive lover anywhere is still intact. There is just that scary thought of being completely jaded. I don't want that.

(Next time, when somebody asks me why I am single, I'd say I'm too busy watching exhibitionists rub their crotches online.)

..........

EDIT: I just reread this entry and felt stupid, haha. Why do I still talk about these things?!